Broken but Built

I am broken. Being in Ghana has made me even more aware of my brokenness. I want to go home. This morning, as I joined some friends to pray on campus, I was a zombie with an obsession to go home. I kept thinking, "If only there was a way for me to have to go home rather than choose to quit." As of now, there isn't a way. And that's a blessing. Being here, even though things are messy, is a blessing.

I'm discouraged. I'm broken. But while we were on campus this morning, a freshman named Kofi came and joined us. He asked questions about who we were and what we were doing here. He lives in Queens Hall, the hall in which I work. Kofi was so excited to hear that we are here to build up the Christians in Ghana. He was so excited to hear that we have a Bible study for Queens Hall. I have a feeling that we will be seeing Kofi often next semester.

Kofi didn't know that I work in his hall even though Aaron kept implying it by saying that he'd be seeing me around and I would be at Bible study and such. But Kofi said he knew why Aaron kept pointing him to me; he "can tell I have wisdom and knowledge and answers." Kofi believes I'm here for a reason. Kofi believes I'm here to build him and others.

As I listened to Kofi, I wanted to cry. God spoke to me through this freshman who hungers for more of God and His truth. God reassured me that there's a purpose in me being here this morning. In the midst of all of my frustrations and discouragement, God met me in a simple way to tell me He loves me and desires to work with me even in my brokenness.

This week, I've been listening to a song called "Build Us Back." It's not a coincidence; God led me to it because I need to be reminded of the truths in it. It's a good one. Some of the lyrics say

We are scared, we are poor
All our safety nets are torn
We've been humbled to our knees
From these ruins, we believe

When the thief takes
When our hopes cave
You build us back, You build us back
When the earth shakes
When the world breaks
You build us back

 I am scared. My safety nets are torn - each one of them. But I can continue to believe that when the thief takes all of my joy and replaces truth with lies, God builds me back. When my hopes are caving and diminishing, He builds me back with His truth. When my world is breaking and my heart is aching, He builds me back. And this morning, it was through Kofi. Praise God for being so faithful in all of my brokenness. No matter what ruins we're in, we can believe that He will build us back because He promises to do so. And He is faithful; this is all about Him. Not me. Not you. Just Him. 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24 says
 

May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.
 

He will sanctify me, make me more like Jesus. And I can trust in that. I can trust in His faithfulness even on the days when all I want is to quit and go home. God who calls me is faithful, and He will work out His purposes in all of this even in Kumasi. And I just need to trust in that truth.