I honestly forgot that fact multiple times throughout the day. In fact, I forgot that my parents shipped me off with a Valentine's Day card until just now...
Thanks, Mom and Dad!
Valentine's Day didn't seem to be a big thing here in Târgu Mureş, Romania. The first time I really thought about the holiday was when the man in front of me at the line in the grocery store was buying a box of chocolates, and that was in the evening. Oops.
I have mixed feelings about Valentine's Day. I love homemade Valentines. I really love chocolate. There are parts of the celebration that I love. But there are also parts I dislike. I have never really enjoyed the expectation of Valentine's Day; even when I had a boyfriend to celebrate with, I disliked that the media me that was the day to celebrate love. I love love, and I firmly believe it should be celebrated more often than once a year. Random Thursday or Friday or any day surprises sound better than Valentine's Day to me.
The intensity of the holiday finally hit me just before I went to bed. I scrolled through my Facebook news feed and saw post after post of couples, flowers, teddy bears, gifts, and single people celebrating with someone else's baby. It was overwhelming.
As I restlessly tossed and turned and failed to overcome jet lag, I couldn't get those images out of my mind.
I was frustrated. I wasn't jealous, but I wasn't content with what I saw.
This week it has been easy for me to embrace my singleness. There are times when it's not easy, but this week has been different. Valentine's Day wasn't a day where I wanted a boyfriend or a husband or a cute little family.
On February 14, 2014, I had what I wanted, and I wanted others to have it too.
I believe some people posted pictures just because they were excited and wanted to share their joy. But I also believe others posted to prove that they matter, that they are loved.
I believe that they, that you, that I, matter. I believe that they, that you, are loved. I believe that I am loved.
I greatly dislike that society tells us that in order to be worth something, we need someone with whom we can spend that one day. We aren't meant to be defined by our relationship status or the number of flowers we receive. A ring can't bring true security and satisfaction. We are meant for something so much more.
This Valentine's Day, I had what I truly wanted. Sure, I want a husband some day. I may get one; I may not. But a husband will never bring greater security or love to my life. If marriage happens, it will only come from the security and love I am already experiencing.
This Valentine's Day, I found contentment knowing that I am in a place where I am able to witness and experience more of God's love. I am learning more of what it means to be loved by him. And he is all I need.
I am learning to be secure in the love of Jesus, and I want that for everyone else too. My heart breaks for the people whose dreams were shattered yesterday, for the people who think they are worth even less because they spent the night alone, for the people in broken relationships that they hang on to solely for false security, for the people who don't know what it is to be securely loved by the One who is love.
Can we start a revolution? Can we demonstrate real love? Can we stop pretending like our family and friends are the ones who bring fulfillment into our lives? Can we point others to Jesus? Can we celebrate the love that really matters -- the love that is willing to suffer death, even death on a cross? Can we be secure in His love, be in love with Him, and be unashamed to proclaim it?
I want to be. I know I am not perfect at it, but I long to be secure and in love, and I refuse to settle for anything less. Are you with me?
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